Unspoken Conversations, by Georgia
Posted at 9:27 AM
by Georgia, in memory of her brother John who died when he was 19 years old from an aortic dissection due to Marfan

John Morrell III

Monologue
Your heart ripped right in two, at least thats what the doctors said. A dissected aorta at least thats thier technical name. Gotta make it sound pretty right.

It Split right open, a broken heart how apropo. Sometimes I wonder why your broken heart killed you. Mine broke that night, it just didn't know enough to stop beating.

I grilled those poor doctors. Grilled them as though answers could bring you back to life. You know what they tried to say? "A weak heart." A weak heart? A weak heart ! They didn't know you very well did they.Nothing about your heart was weak.

Well then again they didn't know you at all did they. By the time they met you, you were just a body to them, A cadaver.

I challenged them. Of cource I did. I had a rush of bravery spurned by the nobility of honoring the dead. That combined with a grief loostened tongue. You shoulda heard me I sounded like, well I sounded like mom when she would mortify us with her loud maternal defense of our every action. Remember?

Remember how we'd try to dissapear into the background or see who the ground would swallow up first during her motherly tiraids. Well.....That was me. Your dear sweet quiet sister at her absolute finest. It worked though. Who knows maybe mom was right all along. The doctors stopped sugar coating the acid. They said your heart...well it grew and grew until it pulled apart. Like those water balloons we'd fling at each other. Remember how if we let them fill to long they'd just get bigger and thinner till. POP all that would be left was that latex ring around the faucet.

That I could Buy. Your heart was to big.

God the stories I could tell. Lost strays, hurting friends, desperate strangers, I always said you kept them all in your heart. Always wanting to help.

Guess I was right huh. You stored so much in your heart, it just kept growing to fit it all in

It just kept growing

your heart wore itself out.Want to know my theory? It wasn't because it was weak. You used your heart just as much as most people do in a lifetime. You just did it in 19 years. A lifetime of love in 19 years. 19 years. I have 19 years of storys on you. 19 years of being a big sister. 19 years of sharing my life with you.. 19 years of knowing the best thing to happen in my life.

Did you know I even knew that the day they brought you home?

Most kids, they hate the new baby and run away FROM it. Me they caught packing up your baby things. Why? when they asked I just explained " you don't love me anymore, now that you've got the baby.But since it's not his fault so I was running away with but he's coming with ME.

See I always new you were meant to be in my life.

I guess it's about that time. I'm gonna have to go. Sorry Bro.

You know what? I was thinking I hope when God fixed your heart up there he super sized it. You deserve the biggest heart they have in heaven. After all you had one of the biggest on earth.